Archive for the ‘Baby`s First Year’ Category

Feeding
A person has to eat and drink every day to live. Food is a fundamental, and if all is well, a joyful aspect of life, particularly in the first few years of life. In fact, the

child has to learn to digest, step by step. The digestive system develops as a result of digesting food. The importance of feeding the baby becomes particularly clear when she

is very small: she meets the world and relates to it in such a way that the food is assirnilated and incorporated as her own substance.

The quality of food and feeding
The child has a natural propensity for learning to digest all sorts of natural products. If there is not enough time for this learning process, if the preparation is not adapted

to the age of the child, or if, for example, unnatural substances — such as colouring agents or taste enhancers —are added to the food, the digestive process may become

disrupted, giving rise to problems. One example of this is over-sensitivity to food. Fortunately, many problems can be resolved, but it is best to use as few products with

artificial additives as possible in the baby’s food.
Another aspect is the nutritional quality of the products themselves. These days everyone knows about calories and carbohydrates, proteins and fats, and it is easy to forget

that our food consists of substances that were originally alive.
The quality of the food is related not only to the composition of a product, but also to its vitality. This in turn relates to the way in which the living product was able to

grow and develop. Vitality does not thrive when the process is hurried, and the vitality of a food crop also flourishes best when there is harmonious development with no

artificial fertilizers to accelerate growth. Harmonious development also means that crops are less susceptible to disease and infestation, so that fewer insecticides and

weed-killers have to be used.

Products, which are grown biodynamically or organically, comply with these conditions of cultivation. In addition, these types of farming devote a great deal of attention to

promoting the vitality of the soil and crops. Therefore, organically and biodynamically (often marked Demeter) grown products are preferable for the baby’s diet. These kinds of

products are usually sold in health food shops.
The advice on feeding given below reveals that a great deal of attention is devoted to cereals. In western food habits, potatoes as well as meat have an important place.

However, a diet consisting of different cereals, such as rice, millet, oats and buckwheat (which is actually not a cereal), when supplemented with dairy products, constitutes

just as balanced a diet as potatoes and meat. In fact, our preference is for cereals, because they are harmonious food crops, strongly related to light and the warmth of the

sun, which are extremely important factors for nutrition. Cereals are also preferable from the point of view of the environment, because their cultivation is relatively less

harmful than the cultivation of potatoes.
In our opinion, a balanced diet should consist of cereals combined with dairy products, nuts, fresh fruit and vegetables, all grown biodynamically or organically. Obviously, a

small child gradually develops to include these in her diet, and the following, guidelines may prove useful. Peanuts should be avoided with children with a family history of

atopia (allergy) until the age of three years. Other nuts should be avoided where the child is known to react to peanuts.
At the baby clinic, advice on feeding is related to the individual child as well as the wishes and possibilities of the parents. After all, eating should be a pleasure. Healthy

digestion is promoted by a pleasure in food and by eating in a relaxed and friendly atmosphere.
The development of feeding
The development of a child in her first year is enormous. In the space of just one year, she develops from a sleeping baby lying in her cot to a toddler, fully alert, standing

in her playpen. This development is reflected in the development of feeding.
Initially eating and drinking are one — all the food is liquid and absorbed by means of breastfeeding or bottle-feeding. During the course of the first six months, solids are

added — pureed fruit and vegetables, given on a spoon. During the second six months, these solids become more varied and thicker by adding cereals. A bowl of porridge is also

introduced to replace the breast or bottle-feeding.
By the end of the first year, the child is eating real food and drinking real drinks. Up to this point, vegetables have been pureed in a thick
liquid form, but by now they are Usually cut up into chunkier pieces. The child can eat her first sandwich and drink from a beaker. All this is quite different from the

situation at the beginning.

Breastfeeding
If at all possible, we always advise breastfeedin,-, for the first few months, even if the mother goes back to work and can only breast-feed for a short time. In view of the

great advantages of breastfeeding, the baby will profit from any mother’s milk it can get. For example, the milk produced for the first few days after birth, the so-called

colostrum, cannot be matched by any type of bottle-feeding because of its wealth of antibodies and vitamins.
During the following months, breast milk also continues to protect the baby from infections. Breast-feeding provides the most suitable food for the digestive organs of the

child, which are still developing. Breastfeeding is recommended, if possible, until nine, or at the latest, twelve months of age. For children with an increased risk of allergy

— for example, owing to parents with allergies — it is even more important to breastfeed exclusively for the first six months, as this decreases the risk of allergic complaints.

The gut matures progressively durin,, the first year and can increasingly keep undigested substances out of the body. Children who are breastfed are rarely overweight. In

addition, breastfeeding helps to establish a special bond between the mother and child.
Are there any disadvantages? One of the disadvantages that might be put forward is that it costs the mother a great deal of energy. She gives away a lot. Some mothers hardly

notice this, but others feel exhausted after a few months; literally sucked dry.
Eating well and drinking a lot are important, but not the whole story. It is just as important to rest and take some time for yourself now and then. Admittedly, parents rarely

manage to avoid losing out on sleep
losing
during the first few months, but you can make sure that this does not go too far by taking a nap in the afternoon, and perhaps asking people around you to help.
Taking time for yourself may seem more difficult, particularly when there are other children. However, if you can see how important this is, it is often possible to organize a

few hours a week when you can do what you like. The practical aspects of breastfeeding are described in detail in the section with practical advice for different stages (see

pp.55, 64, 72 and 80).
How long should you breastfeed?
Stopping breastfeeding can often be a difficult and emotional time. Mothers stop for different reasons.
Sometimes, the child no longer seems► interested in breastfeeding, for example, if she is given a lot of other food. In many cases, it is the mother who wants to stop because of

her job, or because feeding is difficult, takes a great deal of energy, or simply because she thinks it is the right moment for her and for the child. Many mothers stop at an

early stage, often because they have little help or support from the people around them. This is a pity, and continues to be a source of concern for baby clinics. Some mothers

find feeding so easy and the baby enjoys it so much, that they seem able to go on forever, sometimes far beyond the first year. Looking at the child and her development, we feel

that breastfeeding after the first year is no longer suitable for the particular stage the child is at, because the child is more independent. As regards the motor development

of the mouth and the development of the teeth, it is important for a child to get used to eating from a spoon and swallowing from about five months, and later to start chewing

thicker and coarser food. By nine months, children can often eat a sandwich; at this stage, sucking (either bottle-feeding or breastfeeding) is no longer appropriate for the

newly acquired motor development of the mouth.
At the same time, the child is undergoing motor development, which means that from being completely dependent in the first few months, she becomes able to move inde-pendently,

when she starts to crawl and walk. In this way, the child literally shows that she is separating herself from the mother, and we feel that stopping breastfeeding is suitable at

this stage.
If you go on breastfeeding for longer than a year, the child becomes much more conscious of everything, including the breast producing the milk, which feels good to suck. In

addition, a child of that age increasingly imposes her own will, and some children can start to insist very forcefully on being breastfed.
Bottle-feeding
If the baby is not breastfed, or if all the measures taken to stimulate breastfeeding are unsuccessful or inadequate (see p.60), the baby must be bottle fed. Giving a bowl of

cereal to replace breastfeeding is not possible for the first few months, because it is too difficult to digest and the baby’s sucking reflex is still too great.
There are many sorts of bottle-feeding; we will give a general summary here and list the advantages and disadvantages of the different types. Many changes are taking place in

this field and it is always a good idea to discuss the matter at the baby clinic.
We make a distinction between using formula milk, and bottle feeds which you prepare yourself.
Formula milk, also known as complete baby food, is composed
in such a way that a baby does not need any solids up to the age of six months. Organic formula milks are now also available.
If you prepare the feed yourself, this makes use of diluted cow’s milk with the addition of almond paste, lactose and eventually rice flour until six months of age and then

wheat flour. If breastfeeding is entirely replaced by this type of bottle-feeding, it is necessary to start adding supplements in the form of fruit and vegetables at an early

stage — that is, at about two months of age — in the form of two teaspoons of carrot (or other) juice daily.
Advantages and disadvantages One advantage of formula milk is that it is a complete product which is generally well tolerated and easy to prepare.
One of the disadvantages is that it is an industrial product and is, therefore, not prepared with fresh ingredients. Furthermore, because of the many processes to which the

basic raw materials are subjected, they are further removed from their natural origins than food that you prepare yourself. If parents prefer not to give their child vitamin K

or vitamin D the disadvantage of this complete baby food is that these vitamins are added as standard.
In this book we are unable to discuss the various types of non-organic products for bottle-feeding in specific detail. There is a large range of ‘ordinary’ products on the

market, as well as specific products for bottle-feeding children with feeding problems, which can be particularly useful for children with allergies to cow’s milk or proteins,

and should certainly be discussed at the baby clinic.
There is an important distinction between organic and non-organic formula milk. Organic formula products are based on organic cow’s milk, which is a great advantage,

particularly for babies, as it contains less pesticides. In addition to some vitamin K, less vitamin D is added to this product than to the non-organic bottle-feeding products.

Thus there is still a choice to adapt the amount of vitamin D to the season to some extent, for example, only giving extra vitamin D during the winter months. Again, this should

be discussed at the baby clinic.
The above-mentioned disadvantages of non-organic bottle-feeding with regard to processing also apply to organic feeding.
Since 1999, adding vitamin B  has been compulsory in the EU for products sold as ‘baby food.’ As organic baby foods are generally richer in vitamin BI than ordinary baby foods,

and we believe that a varied, good quality diet contains enough vitamin B 1, we do not support this EU regulation. The addition of vitamin B I must be mentioned on the

packaging. For some products, a temporary exception will apply. Look at the packaging to see whether or not vitamin BI has been added.
`Next stage milk’ (also called ‘follow on’ milk) is available for both organic and non-organic baby foods. This is recommended for children from the age of six months, because

cow’s milk, including diluted cow’s milk, is allegedly too rich in minerals and too low in iron. In our opinion, healthy children are able to tolerate (diluted) cow’s milk very

well from six months, and a varied diet prepared using high quality ingredients will contain sufficient iron, even if the child eats a vegetarian diet.
For children with digestive problems, or children whose growth is slow, the next stage milk may be a good alternative.
It may be possible to find a formula milk made from goat’s milk for children with digestive problems as well as children who are sensitive to cow’s milk, as they are often able

to tolerate this better.
One of the advantages of preparing bottles yourself, is that parents can prepare the bottle with products which have biodynamic or organic origins. In addition, vitamin K and

vitamin D are not added as standard, so this also remains a choice you can make yourself. The preparation requires slightly more time than formula milk preparation.
One disadvantage is that it is necessary to start to supplement the diet with fruit and vegetables at a relatively young age. Preparing bottles yourself is not suitable for

children who have difficulties with digestion, or who have an allergy problem.
Preparing bottles using abnond paste as a base
The recipe for this bottle-feeding product aims to approximate the composition and nutritional value of mother’s milk as closely as possible, taking into account the baby’s

digestive possibilities. For this purpose, cow’s milk is greatly diluted for bottle-feeding babies up to the age of four months, and carbohydrates (in the form of lactose) and

proteins and fats (in the form of almond paste) are added.
For babies over four months, the milk is not so diluted, and some rice flour (until 6 months) and cold-pressed sunflower or olive oil are added to the bottle. Boiled milk is

less easily digested than unboiled pasteurised milk.
The milk is diluted as follows.
See Feeding Table, p 114
It was decided to add almonds to the product for bottle-feeding because they are easily digestible
and can easily be mixed, as well as having a pleasant taste. Other nuts are less suitable in this respect. Furthermore, almonds are rich in fats, proteins and trace elements,

which are a good supplement to the diluted milk used for bottle-feeding. Bottle-feeding using almond paste as a base originally came from Germany, where a university clinic

found that it had positive results. Recipes for this type of bottle-feeding can be found in Chapters 3-6 at the end of each chapter.
We advise against using unpasteurised goat’s milk rather than cow’s milk to prepare the bottle-feeds because of the low folic acid content in goat’s milk. Some brands add extra

folic acid to their goat’s milk.
Weaning
If the baby is breastfed, it is excellently fed and only really needs solids from about six months. Nevertheless, if allergies are not present, we advise starting to give solids

slightly earlier. From four to five months the child becomes increasingly interested in the world about him and wants to explore this world. This need is met by providing fruit

and vegetables. Being fed with a spoon is also a new experience.
For the child to learn to taste things’, and for the digestive system to develop well, it is best to give
0-4 months
I part full-fat milk to 2 parts water
4-6 months
I part full-fat milk to I part water
2 parts full-fat milk to I part water
months
8 months +
undiluted

Root
Stem/leaves
Flower/fruit
carrot
beetroot
Jerusalem artichoke parsnip
cauliflower spinach endive
lamb’s lettuce salad greens leaf beet fennel
kohlrabi pak choi
broccoli pumpkin courgette peas
french beans runner beans mangetout fruit
each new type of fruit or vegetable for a few days in succession. When the child has become used to this, it is possible to try out a new fruit or vegetable. Then they can be

alternated, or two vegetables can be combined. As far as possible, our preference is for fruit and vegetables which are in season, and which have been grown biodynamically or

organically in the open ground. Greenhouse products should be used as little as possible.
Fruit and vegetables
When choosing vegetables it is a good idea to take into account the fact that plants consist of three elements — that is, the root system, the stem/leaves and the flower/fruit.

A harmonious diet takes each of these three elements into account, either alternately or in combination with each other. In food crops one of the three elements is usually

predominant. Fruit obviously represents the
flower/fruit element. The practical section of this book indicates when a particular type of fruit or vegetable can be introduced.
Nitrates
Many vegetables — particularly green vegetables — naturally contain nitrates. As nitrates are partially converted in the body into nitrites and nitrosamines, which can be

harmful to health, it is a good idea to take the nitrate content of different types of vegetables into account, particularly for very young babies.
Adults are much less at risk. The nitrate content of vegetables is influenced by the method of cultivation. The use of artificial fertilizers, as well as greenhouse cultivation

out of season, increase the nitrate content. In general, organically and biodynamically grown vegetables contain fewer nitrates than conventionally grown vegetables. It is not

necessary to remove all vegetables containing nitrates from the diet. This would leave only a limited range of vegetables, and it is possible to keep the nitrate levels in the

baby’s diet low if a few general
el
rules are observed:
—    as far as possible, buy vegetables which are in season and which have been grown biodynamically or organically, and use only fresh products;
—    do not give the baby any vegetables rich in nitrates before the age of six months;
—    do not include vegetables rich in nitrates more than twice a week in the diet;
— cook vegetables rich in nitrates as quickly as possible (this does not apply for beetroot) and throw away the water they were cooked in. Never reheat the vegetables.
Vegetables low in nitrates are: cauliflower, broccoli, pumpkin, parsnip, Jerusalem artichoke, carrot, peas, french beans, runner beans, courgettes, mangetout.
Vegetables rich in nitrates are: endive (moderately rich in nitrates), lettuce, salad greens, leaf beet, beetroot, spinach, lamb’s lettuce, fennel, kohlrabi.

Cereals
Cereals are the seeds of plants in which the three main elements are represented in a particularly harmonious way. Cereals have strong roots, a well-developed stem and powerful

fruit/seeds, which ripen in the sun. This food crop can be combined with all the vegetables mentioned above.
Cereals can be added to the fruit or vegetables in the form of flakes or flour from the age of six to seven months. Up the age of six or seven months you should use cereals

which do not contain gluten, because some children do not tolerate gluten very well. Cereals which are gluten-free include rice, maize and crops related to cereals, such as

buckwheat and quinoa. Millet contains a substance similar to gluten, but this is usually tolerated very well.
After six or seven months it is possible to gradually introduce oats, barley and wheat; these cereals do contain gluten. Rye is only given after a few years.
Cereals are made digestible through a process of milling, rolling, soaking, cooking and simmering. Some of this is done in a factory, for example, milling or rolling the cereal

to produce flakes, or processing cereals to make instant products. The rest in done at home in the kitchen. It is important to do this carefully because the small child’s

digestive system is still limited. Further instructions are given in Chapters 3-6.
Potatoes, pulses, meat and eggs It is quite possible to ensure a good and balanced diet without potatoes, pulses, meat and eggs. Unlike true roots, potatoes are stem tubers that

develop underground, in a kind of reversal of the principles governing a stem. Qualitatively, they have a different effect on the metabolism of a small child, and so we do not

recommend them for babies.
Eggs, meat and to some extent, pulses, have a high protein content in contrast to breastmilk. This can accelerate physical growth and weight gain beyond what is appropriate for

the slow maturation of human beings. For these reasons we do not recommend these foods for a small child’s development.
A sweet tooth
Breast milk is naturally sweet, as it seems that a small child initially needs this sweet taste to be able to grow and thrive. Many parents prefer not to give their child

anything sweet, even in a bottle, because they are afraid that the baby will get too used to the sweet taste. In fact, children who cannot do without sweets, sandwiches with

sweet spreads, sweet puddings etc. share a common problem, which has a bad effect on their teeth and their health i n general. However, the fear of getting used to sweet foods

in the first year is not justified if the sweet taste is not overdone.
In the practical sections on feeding (see Chapters 3 and 4), only the almond bottle feeds and porridge are sweetened. All the foods can be given unsweetened. In the first few

months, it is possible to use lactose, but later it is possible to choose between malt products (barley malt syrup, rice malt syrup) and maple syrup.
Salt and herbs
During the first year no salt should be added to the food. Salt, such as that which is found naturally in cow’s milk, is sufficient; the baby would not be able to tolerate any

more. Nor should any herbs from the garden be added to the food. The baby’s voyage of discovery through the tastes of all the new foods is intensive enough in itself.
Heating up food
For the first year, all bottles and food are given at body temperature. Vegetables and cereals are always cooked. By steaming the vegetables rather than boiling them in water,

the nutritional value is retained more effectively. Use a steamer or a metal colander placed on top of a pan with a small amount of boiling water, and a lid on top.
Raw vegetables are not given until after the baby is one year old. Cooking the food usually makes it easily digestible, but this does not apply to cow’s milk, which should not

be heated above body temperature in the first year, as it becomes too heavy
to digest. Pre-packaged milk, including organic milk, is pasteurised. The process of pasteurisation sterilizes the milk, which is a prerequisite for baby food, though it does

not affect its digestibility.
Cooking fruit is not necessary, except at the very beginning. As it ripens, the fruit has already absorbed so much of the warmth of the sun that the baby will be able to digest

uncooked fruit very easily.
Cook vegetables and cereals in a thick-bottomed pan so that the food cooks evenly, which will enhance its quality and taste.
It is not a good idea to heat food in a microwave or use food from the freezer. Both the microwave and the freezer remove vital qualities from the food, which a small baby

needs. The microwave does not add warmth to the food, but shocks the stored warmth out of the product.
Pureeing the food
Solids should be pur6ed up to the age of eight to nine months. After that, it is possible to puree the food more coarsely, when bread is introduced. If the fruit or vegetable is

suitable, it can be mashed.
A pur6e sieve (hand mincer) is best for preparing the food because it pur6es it, as well as removing parts of the food which are difficult for the child to digest. Electric hand

mixers and food processors do not do this; they merely pur6e the food. This means that the fibres of some vegetables or cereals, which are    into the food, which can give

some
difficult to digest, also end up in    children wind or colic. the baby food. They also beat air.

Toys and playing
A newborn baby has a special relationship with the world around it. In the first place, the child and his world are still one, and all the impressions from that world have a

deep effect on the child’s organism. This applies to the baby’s food, but also for impressions, such as the arms rocking him or the sound of lullabies.
In addition, we find that everything the child does is a form of play. The whole voyage of discovery of his own body takes place with great perseverance, as well as with great

joy. For example, the child sees and discovers his hands and puts them together. Although these are uncontrolled movements at first, the baby practises this hand-eye

coordination time and time again. The pleasure he gets from this is quite tangible.
The baby needs very few toys during his first year, actually no more than what is available in the home in terms of safe and attractive shapes, and what you can make simply

yourself. The fewer objects in the child’s environment, the more thoroughly these will be explored, held, sucked and eventually understood. If the child has too many toys he

cannot
choose; attention to the world, interest and concentration can actually be practised best when the child has few objects around him.
Background music should also be avoided. It distracts the child from listening to the sounds produced by his own activities.
Every object should be simple and straightforward, so that it leaves something to the child’s imagination.
We should focus our attention not only on the safety of the material, but also ask ourselves whether the child can gain different experiences. A piece of wood has a particular

weight, which can be felt and a grain which can be examined with the fingertips. Both elements reveal very different things from a cuddly toy. The child’s gaze can be captured

by bright colours and rigid, caricatured shapes; his eyes are powerfully drawn to the object, and it is no longer possible to pay attention to it in a free and playful way. This

applies to an extreme extent with regard to television.
It is a good idea to alternate playing alone and playing together. On the one hand, it is good for the child’s development to learn to play alone and experience things in a

quiet, peaceful atmosphere. On the other hand, the parent and child can gain a great deal of pleasure, for example, from playing games while the child sits on his parent’s lap,

giving and taking bricks and so on. The practical sections of this book explore further possibilities in greater detail.
Play is an essential element in a child’s life. It is a preparation for being able to work with concentration and enthusiasm in adult life.
Safety
The child’s safety is an important part of upbringing. Parents can avoid many dangerous situations, though not all, by taking safety measures in and around the house.
Keeping an eye on the child, knowing where he is and what he is doing, is the second important factor with regard to safety at home.
The third factor is concerned with teaching the child. You can teach your child safe behaviour by helping him to learn to recognise dangerous situations, by teaching all sorts

of skills properly (going up and down stairs, cycling etc.) and by insisting on obedience, particularly with regard to safety. This third factor, teaching safety, hardly plays

any role during the first year. Safety measures in and around the house are discussed in the practical section of the book (see Chapters 3-6).
Many children learn to do something new at a time when you are not really expecting it. Suddenly they appear to be able to roll over or stand up in their cot. Anticipate these

situations and make sure that you take the right safety precautions in good time. The description of successive psychomotor skills may help in this respect.
Parents’ behaviour also contributes to making the environment more or less safe. Clear discipline in the home, clear habits and customs, a good safety routine and clear
agreements    also with brothers
and sisters will increase safety. Nevertheless, it is an art to remember these, even in unexpected situations (the telephone ringing, unexpected visits etc).
Keeping an eye on the child in the first few months mainly means not leaving the baby alone on the dressing table or wherever you change his nappies, and knowing whether there

are any brothers, sisters or pets near him. From the moment that the baby starts to crawl, stand and walk, it becomes increasingly important to keep an eye on him, because the

area in which he moves becomes larger and larger.

Care
Boundaries
Birth is an immense change for the baby. Her whole physiology changes fundamentally and she experiences a completely new environment. The boundaries of the womb are left behind and she enters a ‘boundless’ world. In the womb, the child was able to grow harmoniously, protected from the world.
This reveals that everything that is developing requires a protective environment. With a newborn baby, and actually throughout childhood, this protective environment is constantly provided to establish firm foundations for later life. Unconsciously, the child is constantly reminded of the situation in the womb, which is related to an experience of security, safety, protection and fundamental confidence.
Warmth
The womb not only protects the embryo from the world; it also surrounds it with an even temperature of 37°C (98.6°F). A ‘warm environment’ is provided in the best possible way.
After birth, a child has to learn to maintain her own body temperature at a constant level, at first with the help of adults. She must interrelate the warm and cold parts of the body. This is achieved by means of a sensitive metabolic process which generates heat.
Normal growth and the development of the normal physical processes are also dependent on this metabolism. All the heat which the baby does not have to produce herself in order to maintain her temperature at the right level will benefit growth.
It takes the child a long time to regulate her own temperature; the normal difference of PC (2°F). between the body temperature during the night and the day is achieved by most children between their fifth and ninth months. Up to that time they are extremely dependent on the extra warmth provided in the form of good physical care, clothes, and hot water bottles used to warm the cradle before they are placed in it.
The ability to distinguish whether something is hot or cold is learnt during the initial period. The better this ability has been developed by providing sufficient warmth in childhood, the better the child can use it at a later age.
Cold feet are an important sign that extra attention should be devoted to regulating the child’s temperature. A baby should have warm feet, warm legs, a warm body and warm arms.
Special attention to warmth also has another significance. A warm environment helps the child to ‘warm up’ for life on earth. However, our motto is not ‘the warmer, the better,’ because always being dressed in too many clothes or being covered up can actually make a child either drowsy or very restless, and overheating can be very dangerous. Detailed research has revealed that there is a relationship between overheating and cot death. Duvets and synthetic materials can especially cause overheating. Therefore we certainly advise against using these.
In our view, the important thing is to learn to observe the needs of the child with regard to warmth, and to read the signs when more or less warmth needs to be provided in the form of clothes, bedding or ambient heating. The body temperature of the child is the most important thermometer, and in a healthy baby, this fluctuates around 37°C (98.6°F). You can learn to take the baby’s temperature with your hands so that you can literally feel how the child is regulating its own temperature. In the first week or two after birth, take the baby’s temperature every day, as well as feeling how warm she is. Then start testing yourself: feel how warm the baby is, then predict her temperature and check with the thermometer for a few days. If your predictions are correct, you will only have to take the baby’s temperature when you are doubtful or if she is sick.
Impressions
Everything we do, feel and think around the child is assimilated by the child. She is still completely open and has a boundless trust in the environment. The buffer which
we have between ourselves and the world as adults is formed by recognising and understanding that world. A small child is not yet able to do this. Up to about the third year, the child identifies with the environment in which she is living in a very natural way. This is followed by a stage in which thinking gradually assumes set patterns, and the child leans to distinguish herself from the outside world. For the first time, she makes a distinction between her own individuality and the world which is perceived. In this light it is understandable that first memories only go back to the third year, and there are no, or very few, memories before this.
The child is one big sensory organ. Up to the third year, all impressions are assimilated in an uninhibited way and disappear into the subconscious. There they are combined with other physical processes, and a sort of print is made; it is as though the child models the influences of the environment in its own `clay.’ Therefore, it is important that we are aware of what ‘goes into’ the child — also for later on.
Example. A child in a boat on the water, experiences the swell, feels the sunlight on her skin and the wind in her hair, smells the odour of water and fish, is taking in healthy impressions which build up the whole organism. The situation is quite different for a child at a department store who is placed in a rotating ship, which goes round and round when a coin is placed in the machine. The child will enjoy both these experiences, but they affect the organism in significantly different ways. The ‘boat on the water’ situation sounds idyllic; this is usually a vacation experience. However, there are also impressions closer to home, which can be constructive and have the above-mentioned character
Positive, constructive impressions are those impressions in which the natural origin of materials, sounds etc, can be perceived by the child. For hearing, these are the sounds of people and animals, and natural sounds such as the rustling of the wind. For sight, they are natural colours. For the sense of touch, they are materials such as wool, cotton, silk, wood, sand and water.
Many domestic appliances such as vacuum cleaners, washing machines, radio, television and plastic toys were created as a result of human technical ingenuity. For children, these are actually an abstraction, lacking in natural connection.
Radio, television and plastic toys are things you can consciously choose to have or not to have in a small child’s immediate environment. With household appliances, you can take care to minimize the sound in the baby’s immediate environment. So-called ‘white noise’
from household appliances is not a good idea for the young child as it blocks out normal impressions. Autistic children can also become obsessed by white noise. Playing a lyre, humming or singing are better background sounds for the child.
Simple actions such as washing hands, or sweeping up with a dustpan and brush in the child’s presence show how things are done. These actions are enjoyable and you can invite children to imitate them.
The feelings of people around the child also have an effect. It is obvious that a child will thrive best in a genuine atmosphere of joy and warmth. This has a positive effect. But there is not a parent in the world that is always cheerful and relaxed at every moment of the day (and night). It is worth aiming to achieve these qualities, but at times when you do not succeed, you must take them for what they are — also real human emotions. In every family there are days when everything goes pear-shaped and the ideal image of a happy family seems a long way off. Humour is always a good remedy. It can be a relief if you can laugh about yourself and the situation.
The needs which were mentioned above — that is, the need for boundaries, warmth and positive impressions — make great demands on the environment. It means that parents must have clear insight and a good level of empathy to get things right: too cold or too warm, too many im-pressions or too quiet, well-protected or not enough room to breathe?
From this point of view, we would like to discuss a number of practical aspects of childcare.
Clothes
Clothes are like a second skin, which support the functions of the skin. The skin helps to regulate body temperature and protects us from infections. In addition, the skin is a sensory organ with which we perceive the environment. These three functions are most effectively supported with clothes made of wool, silk, cotton or hemp. These fibres are preferable as they provide sense impressions from a natural source via the skin, which help the child to build up its body. Other fibres are more alien, and even viscose, which is made from cotton or wood, is processed quite strongly, in a way which is now known to be quite polluting.
Wool
Sheep’s wool protects the sheep from heat and cold, rain and toxic waste. The curls trap the warm air around the sheep’s skin. The wool keeps out the rain, and waste products are absorbed and emitted through the wool via perspiration.
All these qualities are found in woollen clothes. The warmth of the wool protects the child from cooling down too quickly and supports her unstable heat regulation system which cannot yet retain body heat.
Its absorbent capacity (30 to 40%) ensures that the child remains comfortably dry. The quality of the wool depends on the age of the sheep, the animal’s diet and health, as well as the way in which the wool was turned into clothing.
Finely knitted woollen vests are available, which forma soft, flexible outer skin. Woollen jumpers and cardigans should be loose fitting so that they are easy to put on and take off. Woollen pants are wonderful to use over cotton nappies. They can be knitted easily, preferably from slightly greasy sheep’s wool, and are ideal for absorbing moisture and neutralizing the waste products in urine.
A woollen shawl will keep the baby warm when there are fluctuations in temperature. Woollen socks will also keep the feet nice and warm. Furthermore, wool does not attract dirt, and therefore woollen clothes do not have to washed as often as cotton clothes, though they do have to be aired regularly.
Silk
The silkworm spins its cocoon of silk thread, in which the worm is sealed off from any negative external influences. The silk is made under the influence of sunlight — at sunset, the silkworm stops spinning, and at sunrise, it starts work again.
If you use silk in clothes, you will feel its enclosing qualities. Furthermore, silk can absorb 30% of its weight in moisture without feeling damp. In addition, silk retains heat when it is cold and releases heat when it is warm. That is why silk is worn especially in summer. Silk and, in particular, knitted silk is an excellent basic material for vests, but it is advisable to put a woollen vest over the silk vest as well.
Children who are sensitive to wool against the skin, and children who are very sensitive to impressions and consequently become restless, will benefit from wearing a silk vest.
Cotton
Cotton is widely used nowadays for children’s clothes, especially as this material can be washed so easily in the washing machine. At the same time, it should be said that it actually has to be washed often because it attracts dirt easily. Cotton can absorb 20% of its own weight in moisture.
As cotton cannot absorb heat, this passes easily through the material to the outside air. Consequently, this material is not the best choice for a child’s underclothes throughout the year. Furthermore, the way in which cotton is grown is not particularly environmentally friendly, and chemical products are often used in the treatment of the material. Fortunately, there are several eco-cotton projects which now promote its environmentally-friendly cultivation and processing, and eco-cotton is becoming increasingly available in shops and over the internet.
We suggest dressing the baby in at least two layers of clothing, covering the whole body, including the arms, legs and feet. This produces a layer of air between the two layers which retains heat. In a temperate climate, a long-sleeved woollen vest — or a vest of wool and silk — can be worn for most of the year.
In practice, we regularly find that babies are not dressed warmly enough, and they are often restless and troubled by stomach cramps, or they are constantly crying. The simple remedy of dressing the child more warmly, in better fitting clothes, will do wonders for this.
Bonnets
Unfortunately, bonnets are no longer in fashion. In comparison with the rest of their bodies, little babies often have an enormous — and sometimes rather bald — head. The head is constantly losing heat, which should really be retained for the development of the brain and organs. On the one hand, a silk bonnet will retain the baby’s heat, and oil the other hand, it protects the head and the open fontanel from a restless environment. It is important for the forehead to be free, because this part of the body acts as a sort of thermostat for regulating body heat. Where it is often windy, it may also be necessary for the baby to wear a second bonnet made of wool. There are wonderful bonnets on sale, or they can be knitted in material which is so soft that it is like a second skin.

Bonnets can be removed when the child is in the cot as long as the baby is well protected.
Wraps and swaddling
Because of the need for boundaries, it is understandable why many babies, as well as older children, calm down and fall asleep easily when they are firmly tucked in, or if they are wrapped up or swaddled.
Usually, babies have a flannel sheet wrapped around them, during the postnatal period, but this often disappears, to be replaced by a babygro/sleepsuit. We recommend continning to use a swaddling cloth and wrapping it firmly around the babygro/sleepsuit before putting the baby to bed (see illustration). As the baby still lies with its arms and legs bent, it should be swaddled in this position, to increase the sense of security. The baby can now relax and will fall asleep warm and snug. However, you must make sure that the baby is not wrapped up too warmly (see p.25).
The woollen wrap can serve as a blanket outside the cot for when the baby is fed. When the woollen cloth is no longer sufficient, use a (woollen) baby sleeping bag for in bed.

Children who remain restless and have difficulty falling asleep despite being wrapped up, as well as babies who do not establish a good rhythm of drinking/sleeping, may benefit from the old-fashioned method of swaddling in which the arms are also wrapped up so that the child cannot flail about. Flailing is often a response to crying, cramps or fright, but because it is involuntary, it can cause new restlessness. Swaddling can help to break this vicious circle.
Many parents find it difficult to restrict their baby in this way; in our age of boundless freedom, it is not so easily accepted. However, parents usually overcome their resistance when they see how the baby responds to swaddling. For most babies, it results in a much greater sense of peace, and consequently they sleep well and establish a pattern of sleeping and feeding every few hours. Nowadays, two methods of swaddling are recommended: either ready-made swaddling blankets or swaddling wraps, or using the method shown at the back of this book (see p.108). (See also Blom, Crying and Restlessness in Babies.)
The cradle
The cradle is an important successor of the smallest home in which the baby lived before birth. You can opt for a basket cradle (Moses basket), a wooden (rocking) cradle or
a cot. For safety considerations, the baby’s feet should always be placed at the end of a cot, with its head halfway down. Tuck in the blanket in such a way that the head is free and the shoulders are covered. A hood or canopy over the cradle or cot makes the space more intimate, so that the child is not distracted by the environment and can sleep more peacefully.
For the canopy, it is best to use plain materials in soft colours. A canopy made of light blue silk combined with a layer of pink silk gives a very subtle calming colour.
The mattress must be absolutely flat, providing good support, and it must be well-ventilated and warm. Our preference is for a mattress of kapok, cotton or another natural material. A sheep’s fleece can be placed on the mattress. The fleece is soft and gives a beneficial warmth so that the newborn baby is protected from cooling down too quickly. Make sure that the fleece is not too large and lies on the mattress without any folds. Cover the fleece with a sheet. The bedding should be made of cotton and wool. Do not use synthetic materials. The sheets and blankets should be big enough to tuck the baby in quite firmly. The fleece and the mattress should be regularly aired. If you use a woollen wrap there are likely to be patches of damp under the mattress. If necessary, use a waterproof sheet. There are cotton sheets available that are impregnated with rubber and do not feel clammy. We do not recommend the use of duvets, even those made of wool, because of the risk of suffocation.
If the cradle is next to the window, watch out for overheating in the sun. A baby can easily become too hot in a heated room when the sun shines through the window.
The playpen
Up to the age of four months, it is not really necessary to have a playpen. Nevertheless, when the baby is downstairs, it is a good idea to have a safe place to place it. A wicker basket with a soft cover, or the bed of a pram, are quite suitable.
We do not recommend the frequent use of a baby seat or recliner, as the baby is stimulated by the ac-
tion of sitting in an upright position at a stage when he is still physically immature. The baby can only lie passively in a baby seat, which does not matter for a short period, but is harmful to physical development in the long term.
This objection does not apply so much to the use of a recliner, but there are other objections; when the baby discovers that he can bounce the recliner with one leg, he often finds it difficult to stop, even when he gets tired of the mechanical movement.
When the baby starts to reach out for things and becomes more active in its motor development, it is time for a playpen. Quite apart from the fact that this provides a safe place for the child to learn to sit and stand, it is often a favourite place for being quiet and for playing undisturbed. A cloth cover, like a curtain, along three sides of the playpen will increase the sense of security, and is not to be confused with cot bumpers, which are not recommended as they pose a suffocation risk for the young child. For motor development, it is important that the floor of the playpen is sturdy and not too smooth (for example, a cloth folded double), so that the child can roll over and can put pressure on it.
Walkers and baby bouncers
We emphatically advise against the use of walkers and baby bouncers. These are ‘aids’ which speed up the child’s motor development in an unnatural way. Children certainly like to use these things — especially if they can move around in them quickly — and want to use them more and more. However, it is much better for a child to learn to stand and walk at his own pace. In this sense, walkers and baby bouncers do not help healthy development in any way, and are actually more of a deterrent to healthy development.
Prams and baby carriers (slings)
The pram can be a safe and sheltered place in which the baby can sleep outside during the first few months. For walking, a baby carrier is often a better alternative because it means
that the baby moves in time with the pace at which the adult is walking, and is not shaken about so much as in a pram, as it goes up and down the pavement. The child is carried in a natural position in a baby carrier (sling), (see the illustration on p. 106).
However, at this point a warning should be given. It has been shown that babies can become too hot and stuffy, particularly if carried under a coat. Unfortunately, there are even a few cases, which resulted in a baby’s death. We recommend that you keep a careful eye on a baby in a baby carrier, and if possible carry it on top of a coat rather than underneath, with, if necessary, a woollen cloth around the baby.
The disadvantage of a baby carrier in which the baby is in a vertical position is that the baby did not take up this position itself. In this sense, the baby carrier is not for babies until they reach the age of nine months. A sling is preferable, as the whole back and head are supported, although it might be tiring for the mother to carry.
When a baby has reached the age for a pram, the best model is one in which the baby faces the parent. In this way, the baby constantly has the comforting face of its father or mother in front of it, and can find out from that face what is happening in the big wide world. A traditional pram has the advantage that the child lies flat, as at this age the baby’s head is still relatively heavy and the neck cannot keep the head in a stable position. We recommend a buggy only from the age when the child is able to sit unassisted.

General Points of View
In this section we describe a number of points of view which serve as a guideline for the way we view, and relate to, young children.
The child’s development and care, sleeping and waking, play and toys, safety and feeding are subjects which will be tackled in this section in terms of content. A practical approach to these subjects can be found under the advice for every stage (see Chapters 3-6).
The child’s development
From the moment the child is born, the parents have the important task of monitoring his or her development. This gives rise to many questions. How can we best prepare for the child’s future? Should we, or should we not, familiarize the child with elements of adult life at an early stage, so that she will be prepared for this later on? The answers to these questions will depend on your view of the child’s developmental stages.
We proceed on the assumption that the more successfully a child is able to fully develop at a particular stage, the more harmonious the development will be. This also applies for future development.
Fora baby and young child, this means that we must create the conditions in which a baby can most successfully be a baby, and a young child can most successfully be a young child.
The first developmental stage after birth is strongly centred on the child’s physical and motor development. Growth is quite exceptional during the first year of life, and is still rather like the growth of the embryo. The development and growth, which takes place outside the womb in humans, takes place completely inside the womb in other mammals. When the child is one year old, the development has reached a level comparable to the birth level of other mammals.
For the baby’s development, it is good if the conditions after birth are still quite similar to the situation in the womb. This particularly concerns the protective cocoon around the child. Warmth, a sense of security and some protection against environmental influences promote the baby’s health. It is extremely important for the baby’s physical development for her to have physical contact — rocking, cuddling or simply holding the baby in your arms. Children who lack this physical contact do not develop well, even if they have ‘the best feeding.’ These babies immediately start to grow again when attention and care is devoted to physical contact. Satisfying the need for physical contact gives the child a basis for the rest of his or her life.
Nevertheless, in humans, a good environment alone does not guarantee development. Every person has his own rate of development and his own way of developing. For example, there are babies who develop motor skills very quickly, sit up at an early stage, roll over, stand and walk. On the other hand, other children appear to ’stand still’ in their development fora long time, then seem to miss out a few stages and can suddenly walk, even though they never crawled. Some children start to develop speech very early, while others remain unintelligible for a long time.
It is important to be aware of a child’s own way of developing. There may be a tendency to a certain one-sidedness. This sort of one-sidedness — for example, the slow development of speech — can be regarded as the child’s own way of developing. It is only when this one-sidedness is particularly strong that it may be seen as a developmental disorder.
Thus, the first year of the child’s development can be seen as a continuation of the embryonic stage.
During this first year of life, the body matures to the extent that the child becomes able to control it for herself. A one-year-old child can stand and go where she likes and move about freely in space. It is as though she is taking charge of her own physical body. This stage of development depends on healthy physical growth and development. Illness and malnutrition will immediately delay the process. Development at this stage is mainly influenced by the physical organism and the care of this organism.
The basis for the later development of speech is laid during the first year of life. Talk to, and with, the baby, and play with her. She sees the gestures which accompany words, and hears the songs. All this contributes to the child becoming increasingly familiar with human language. The clearest sign of this is contented baby talk by the end of the first year of life.
After the first year, the child depends on being able to imitate what she has heard. She will start to copy the words herself, first words of one syllable and then words of several syllables. She then begins to combine words, and finally produces short sentences. In this way, the child enters a second area in which she can move about freely — the field of language. By mastering speech and language, the child takes part in social life in her own way, and becomes able to express herself through the spoken word.

The next stage of development is the time at which the child starts to say ‘U Prior to that stage the child called herself by her own name. This can be seen as an expression of the fact that the child was not yet deeply connected with her own body; thus in a sense the child saw herself from outside, as other people see her.
When she becomes more closely connected with her own body, the first, still primitive, sense of self-consciousness emerges and the child experiences a sense of self; she starts to say ‘F and experiences herself as a centre. As a result of this process, the child may also feel cut off from the world around her.
By the age of three or four, the child has gone through a sort of first cycle of development. By learning to stand and walk, she has achieved a certain degree of freedom in space. By learning to speak and understand, she can develop socially and communicate with others. With the deeper connection of the self and the body, self-consciousness emerges for the first time, and this is expressed when the child uses the word ‘I’ to talk about herself.
Learning to use language independently is an important psychological development, as is developing a sense of individuality. However, healthy physical development is always a prerequisite for this. Motor development is particularly important for the development of psychological functions later on. Playing
THE CHILD’S DEVELOPMENT    21
with bricks, simple ball games, finger games, circle games — in short, everything we do with the physical organism of the child as the point of contact — will have a positive influence on development.
The behaviour of the people in the child’s direct environment is very important for development. A small child learns and develops by imitating what she sees, hears, feels and so on. In this way the child learns to walk, speak and think, and during this first learning process carefully assimilates all the details — particularly during the first three years. This once again underlines the importance of being conscious of our own behaviour as well as the material environment of the child (see also Impressions, p.25).
Admittedly, the aspects of child development described here are very general, but they can still provide a direction for the way in which we behave with the child. The care for the physical processes of growth and development are of central importance. We can measure and weigh growth, while we can assess development from the development of the motor system, the mastery of language, and the birth of the ’self’ when the child starts to say ‘F.
Sleeping and waking
During the course of life a person’s need for sleep undergoes great changes. A newborn baby often sleeps for between eighteen and twenty hours out of every twenty-four. A one-year-old can sleep for fourteen hours, while an adult needs between six and eight hours of sleep. Therefore, in the first year of life, the child should spend a great deal of the time asleep.
We have seen that there are two important things in this first year — growth (a baby’s weight triples in the first year) and development. Growth takes place particularly during sleep, while development is stimulated during the waking hours. The various organs ‘learn’ to operate in a sense, with the use of the body during, the daytime (by eating, moving, etc.). What the organs ‘learn’ during the day continues to have an effect while the baby sleeps, and is assimilated in the body’s growth activity.
A one-sided predominance of growth and excessive stimulation to develop both have a negative effect. There should be a healthy balance between the two processes; an alternation between waking and sleeping which is suitable for each stage. When the child is about one year old, this balance will have become established in the operation of the organs, in a particular day/night rhythm — the biological clock.
For good health and for the child to be able to make use of his physical capabilities properly, it is essential for this day/night rhythm to become well established. Therefore, it is literally of vital importance for a small child to establish a steady pattern during the day with regard to sleeping, eating and waking.

A steady pattern of set times in the life of a child promotes growth and development and helps to establish a healthy rhythm of sleeping and waking. Too much stimulation during the day may prevent the child from falling asleep; however, a completely unstimulating environment, without healthy challenges for the child, can also lead to problems with sleep because the child is not sufficiently tired. A healthy routine in the day, alternating challenges and periods of quiet, being together and being alone, can help to correct sleeping problems. Rituals for going to sleep can also be helpful — rocking, singing lullabies, the use of musical boxes or a prayer for the child are methods used by many families.
Sleeping well means that the child must be able to surrender and ‘let go.’ This is not as easy for some children as for others. It is helpful to give the child a sense of security, for example, in the enclosed space of the cradle (possibly with a hood) or lying against the mother. Warmth promotes a sense of comfort and relaxation; a bonnet, a sleeping bag, some drops of lavender water on the pillow, or a hot water bottle can sometimes help babies who find it difficult to fall asleep. Hot water bottles should always be removed before the baby is placed in the warm cradle. A light silk bonnet is appropriate for indoor use, but be aware of the risk of overheating. Wrapping the child up firmly pro-
SLEEPING AND WAKING    23
vides a sense of security as well as a feeling of warmth.
However, there are babies who assimilate everything that happens around them so greedily that they actively seem to suppress their feelings of tiredness and the need for sleep. The more stimulation they are given, the hungrier they seen to be. They are unable to set their own boundaries. Increasingly, we see babies who spend many hours of the day — and sometimes the night —awake, constantly asking for attention from the environment. For these children, the parents must learn to see when they show signs of being sleepy. The fact that this is quite an art is clear from the many stories told about this problem. If you miss the right moment, the child appears to go past his sleepiness and will keep going for many hours. Signs of sleepiness are restlessness or agitation, looking away, rubbing the eyes and face, warm hands and red ears, grizzling and crying. By responding to these signs of sleep immediately and consistently, by placing the baby in his cot, it is possible to create a healthy need for sleep. By not responding straightaway every time the baby cries, he will learn to resolve minor discomfort for himself. It is important to realize that any attention wakes the baby up. All the extra attention and special behaviour associated with going to sleep often achieve quite the opposite of what the parents hope to achieve.

The Baby Clinic
When a mother is expecting a child, this is the beginning of an exciting period; a time of ‘expectation,’ followed by the birth and the baby’s first year. It is a special event every time, but particularly with a first child. Parenthood is `born’ along with the child, bringing all sorts of new tasks and experiences with it.
Baby clinics are located at health centres in virtually every town, and have the important task of monitoring the children and helping parents to look after their young children. In addition to ordinary baby clinics, there are also some clinics based on the approach used in anthroposophical medicine. In general, these are linked to anthroposophical medical practices.
All the work of these clinics is concerned with providing preventative care for children from birth to the age of four or five years. In general, this means providing help and support for parents to promote their child’s health.
The doctor and nursing staff at the clinic devote their attention to the physical and psychological development of your child. They ask questions and examine the child to check for certain disorders: for example, growth or psychomotor disorders; disorders or malfunctions of the cardiovascular system, lungs, kidneys and reproductive organs; ear, nose and throat disorders-, disorders of the abdomen, arms and legs; disorders of the teeth, and visual and hearing disorders.
At anthroposophical baby clinics, the constitutional characteristics of the child are also examined, and the personal characteristics and features, which might indicate a particular approach for medical and/or educational measures, are considered. After all, no child develops in accordance with the statistical norm. It is only by examining the individual developmental opportunities and problems of a child that it is possible to give appropriate advice. This is not so much a matter of preventing disorders, but of helping to ensure that the various developmental stages of the child follow each other in an appropriate way.
In addition, the baby clinic is an important place for parents to ask questions, as advice is offered on different subjects, including feeding and growth, upbringing and looking after the baby, physical and psychological development and the issue of inoculations.

The advice on children from birth to one year which you will find in this book is in line with the care provided by anthroposophical baby clinics, and may differ from the advice given by ordinary clinics, and is related to the views held by the doctor and nursing staff regarding the developing child. In Chapter 2 of this book you will find the viewpoints which form the background for the practical advice. This may be helpful when you want to make your own decision in a particular situation. However, this book serves to supplement rather than replace the supervision of the baby clinic. Whichever clinic you choose, it is important that you discuss any concerns you have, and express what you want, at the clinic.
We hope that the various subjects discussed will encourage a conscious approach to parenting and be helpful with regard to understanding, and living with, a developing child.

Pregnancy
Dufing pregnancy, the mother-tobe is in a very special condition, both physically and psychologically. There are all sorts of indications of a reduction in her level of consciousness, which may be manifested by drowsiness, diminished powers of concentration, dizziness, light-headedness and a floating sensation. At a physical level, there is a loss of muscular strength and a loss of tension in all the involuntary muscles. For example, the intestines work less effectively, which can result in constipation. There may also be changes in the action of the kidneys, blood pressure and pulse.
In a way, this whole condition resembles sleep. You could say that a pregnant woman floats between a waking and sleeping state and feels dreamier than she did before. Nevertheless, many women feel very well and active at the same time.
Pregnancy can be divided into three terms, each of roughly three months’ duration.
In the first three months, the woman’s organism has to be ‘transformed’ into a pregnant condition, or, as described above, the organism has to achieve a state between waking and sleeping. The fact that this is an intensive change is clear from the fact that the first three months of pregnancy are usually accompanied by nausea, vomiting and tiredness. It is during these months that the egg is fertilized, becomes embedded in the womb and the foetus starts to develop. It is a relatively vulnerable period of pregnancy in which miscarriages are fairly common (10%). See p.102 folic acid.
The second three-month term is usually the easiest. The pregnant woman becomes used to her condition, can do all sorts of things and does not experience much physical discomfort from the foetus. The foetus has become ‘firmly established,’ as is shown by the small number of problems during this period.
During the third stage, the physical manifestation of the child becomes increasingly clear, with a large stomach being the first sign of this. The discomfort which a pregnant woman experiences when bending down, urinating, feeling full after a meal, being unable to move, run, laugh and sit, reveals that the child has a clear physical presence. The foetus now becomes more vulnerable again. There may be bleeding or even a premature birth. At the end of this period, birth is often experienced as a real release.
When the woman has given birth, all the symptoms of the condition between waking and sleeping gradually disappear again. Only if she breastfeeds will this process be slightly postponed.
An overview of pregnancy reveals that the pregnant woman achieves a condition where she ‘makes way’ for the child to come; in which the child establishes a place on the way to birth. In a way, the expectant mother becomes less ‘earthly,’ while the child becomes increasingly ‘earthbound.’ From this perspective it is, therefore, not surprising that expectant mothers experience moments of contact with their unborn child. After all, both are in an ‘interim state;’ a state between the earthly world and the world that the child is coming from.
If we try to approach the woman’s pregnancy in this manner — taking the idea of ‘making way’ seriously — it is clearly understandable that during pregnancy a woman often finds it difficult to tolerate direct
confrontation with the world around her, and even tries to avoid it altogether. ‘Listening’ to her inner self is the best guideline.
It obviously goes without saying that alcohol and smoking should be avoided because they are known to affect the development and growth of the unborn child, and medicines should only be taken after consultation with the doctor. In addition, a natural, healthy and varied diet is clearly important for both mother and child.
To prepare for breastfeeding, it is a good idea to apply Weleda iris jelly to the nipples every day to prevent the skin cracking during breastfeeding. Stretch marks are largely dependant on genetic factors. However, it makes sense to keep the skin, particularly around the stomach and thighs, supple during pregnancy, by rubbing the skin twice daily with Weleda arnica massage oil. If there is a sensitivity to arnica, it is possible to use Weleda calendula massage oil.
The birth
Experiencing the birth of a child is one of the most intimate experiences in life. Feelings of astonishment, joy, anxiety, fear and fulfilment are experienced to extremes during the birth. Obviously these are most intense for the woman who is having the baby, but the family members and obstetric staff attending her fully share in the intensity of feeling.

It starts with the excitement and anticipation of what will happen when the waters break or the first contractions start. Getting everything ready, the support and help of the midwife during contractions, the constant question of how far the process has advanced — these are all part of the active and busy atmosphere of birth. However, sometimes there are also moments of near serenity and tranquillity; an atmosphere of relaxation, trust and complete surrender to what is to come.
The birth takes place in these recurrent and alternating periods of intense activity and intense tranquillity. Everyone attending the birth finds that a unique atmosphere develops as a result of these alternate emotions, which can go on for many hours. It is an incomparable atmosphere, evoking feelings of deep wonder and awe.
The focal point of everything that is going on is the mother-to-be. She is in touch with the deepest natural forces in her body, and is in danger of being overwhelmed by these natural forces, with an intensity which rarely occurs in life. She may also feel that she does not have the strength to give birth on her own, and may be very grateful to accept the instructions of the obstetric staff, so that the sense of impotence can make way for a sense of trust in the successful end of the birth.
When the cervix is fully dilated, the moment arrives when she can
THE BIRTH    15
use all her strength to help the child to be born by pushing it out. Just before this moment, it is quite common for the woman’s consciousness to be almost overwhelmed, and then return quite vivdly with the first push. This stage of pushing the baby out is extremely hard work, even though sometimes it only requires one big contraction.
From the moment that the baby’s head emerges, the atmosphere changes immediately. All attention is focused on the delivery of the rest of the baby, who eventually experiences light, air and gravity for the first time, is placed on its mother’s stomach and swaddled in warm nappies (diapers). If not giving birth at home, you should check with your midwife or consultant to see if it is possible to have a warm cloth to swaddle the baby in. All eyes are on the baby; the noises, movements, eyes and hair. Everyone feels an urge to touch the baby and stroke it.
Then the obstetrician focuses on the last part of the delivery: cutting the umbilical cord and delivering the placenta.
The whole birth is only really complete when the mother has been washed and cleaned up, and is holding the pink, warm, swaddled baby in her arms, and is surrounded by everyone who was present at the birth. The whole spectrum of emotions is experienced, together with a sense of satisfaction, gratitude and respect for the forces that play a role in the birth process.

The birth described above is probably the birth every parent dreams of. And yet, no two births are the same. The life of every person starts with a unique event; the delivery. Some children have a difficult start, for example, if the birth was induced too early, the baby was born prematurely, or if the delivery involved a great deal of medical intervention. In the UK most babies are now born in hospital, but it is possible to discuss your birth plan beforehand with your midwife or consultant.
For parents, the fear about the baby’s health or being overwhelmed by a premature birth can obstruct the feelings of wonder and gratitude described above. Sometimes it may be a while before you can start to love your child in a relaxed way and feel an obvious connection with it, particularly if you feel unsure or anxious. This takes time, so you must try and take the time that is needed. If you were admitted to hospital, you can organize a sort of second birth experience, so that when the baby comes home, you can get used to each other, feel each other, and build up a new life together. Many parents have described that this helped them to recognise the healthy aspects of the child and his lust for life.
Parenthood
The birth of a child is an intense experience for the parents, particularly
the birth of their first child. In fact, it brings about many changes. Before the birth the parents had a relationship with each other, and after the birth they have suddenly become parents and formed a family. Obviously, they still have a relationship, but the partners no longer relate exclusively to each other. In particular, the mother focuses body and soul on her child. After the birth it may be a very long time, sometimes as long as a year, before she feels her old self. Consequently, owing to the new situation in which they find themselves, parents have to redefine the way in which they relate to each other.
This process is extremely demanding because the father and mother are involved with the child in very different ways during pregnancy and birth, and during the initial period after birth. The father may have a tendency to continue his old life with some modifications, while the mother has a deep sense that everything has changed. It may be a while before the partners find a new way of relating to each other on the basis of these two different worlds of experience. It is important to take time for this process and talk about it together from time to time.
What was described above applies particularly for the situation in which mother, father and child(ren) form the family. Where there is a one-parent family from birth, this process will particularly concern the mother.

After the birth, another process starts as well in that all parents discover themselves in a new way. They experience new positive feelings, although they can also have a negative character. A child brings happiness and joy, but there are also moments when irritation reaches unimagined heights.
In the whole range of emotions evoked by a child, feelings of anxiety have a special place, giving rise to questions such as: Am I doing it right’? Will anything happen to my child or me? Will everything be okay?
Every step in the child’s development is another step out into the world. From the age of three, the child even ventures beyond the horizons of the parents; he walks around the block or goes to school for the first time.
Some people are more sensitive to these anxieties than others, but since this anxiety is fruitless — and can really make life difficult for a child — something should be found to counterbalance it. Sometimes gaining an insight into the situation helps to diminish the anxiety, but often this is not enough. In order to tackle the anxiety in a structured way, it may be necessary to work on strengthening the parents’ confidence. Obviously this does not mean blind faith that ‘everything will probably be alright.’ It is not as simple as that. It means that it is possible to work on the confidence about the direction in which the
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child is moving, even though unexpected and undesired events may play a role. White anxiety is often ,our own problem,’ confidence can become a strength, which allows the child to flourish; having confidence in someone gives them the strength to grow.
In addition, a child often gives us a new sense of self-awareness: with his behaviour and imitations, he holds up a mirror to his parents. From the age of a few months you will see that a child assimilates the world by imitating it. The child copies everything he encounters, both internally and externally. For parents, this means that what they do and how they do things is important. Whether we do things hastily or with care, whether we do things unwillingly or with joy; all these aspects permeate the actions we perform and are unconsciously assimilated and imitated by the child. This also applies to what we say. Long before the child can understand our words, he will be aware of our intentions. Experiencing this, and occasionally having the things which we do and say, and how we do and say them, reflected by a child will lead to self-awareness, and possibly to a change in our way of being and doing things.
In positive terms, a child stimulates us to develop ourselves as well. There is also a third process. By experiencing the development of a small child and feeling co-responsible for him, it is possible to focus on your own childhood. Some things from your own childhood can lead to the feeling that ‘I want to do things for my children like that as well,’ while at other moments, you feel that ‘I want to spare my children this or that.’ Sometimes this encounter with your own past can be quite intense. It’s good to know that it is not unusual.
Just as we re-examine our own past, we also start to have a different
view of the future; in a sense looking to the future through the child. The future shines through the small child and urges us to determine the structure for that future.
Above, we have highlighted a number of the issues which will confront every parent; the redefinition of the relationship with their partner and other members of the family, a redefinition of themselves, and a new view of the past and the future.